Stress is the same thing as anxiety or fear \u2013 it\u2019s a threat that signals fight or flight. Our survival system, built in from time immemorial, kicks in: a biological function that has helped us to survive from a time when we were cave people and there were dangers lurking all around in the form of dangerous animals, unexpected hazards in the forest or other threats against our lives and health.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We can all certainly relate to everyday situations where this system kicks in without us even thinking about it. In a fraction of a second, we can go from peace and harmony to palpitations and a churning stomach. For example, imagine yourself driving your car through the town, with nice music on the radio, at the end of the working day. Life is simply great, but then suddenly a child jumps out in front of your car, and you have to slam on the brakes. You don\u2019t have time to react before the sweat pours off you and your heart beats like a jungle drum in your chest, your pulse goes through the roof, and you find the whole of your body is shaking. Maybe you even react by getting angry, jumping out of the car shouting, \u2018for goodness\u2019 sake, child, be careful!\u2019. It is a completely natural reaction \u2013 our biological alarm system.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This survival system is not always positive \u2013 it can create problems for us in situations where there is actually no direct danger or threat against our life but somewhere along the way, without even knowing why, we\u2019ve learned that certain things are dangerous. Examples are speaking in public, which is a common occurrence, being in a social context with lots of new people, going to the gym and exercising, etc. You get a surge in stress levels, which for some people can create such stark fears that they avoid doing things or exposing themselves to situations where they expect to have a reaction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
One of the greatest health threats of our times is precisely stress. More and more people succumb to illnesses related to stress, and current research shows that there is a connection between long-term negative stress and cardiovascular diseases. We perform and deliver at an increasingly high level and make excessive demands on our mind and body while far too little allowance is made for recovery. It\u2019s actually not the stress level that is harmful \u2013 it\u2019s the lack of recovery in between bouts of stress that creates problems in the long run. We basically put our foot down on the accelerator and don\u2019t even slow down at any of the red lights that we meet along the way. In the end, we crash into the proverbial wall, and then the way back can take quite a long time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Stress signals that you should take seriously<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 You are easily irritated and get wound up about small things that you would normally not react to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 You have difficulty tolerating loud noise, light and other sensory impressions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 You have difficulty sleeping and find yourself lying there at night, tossing and turning. It\u2019s common to fall asleep quickly but then wake up and be unable to sleep again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Stomach ache, heartburn, gastritis, constipation or diarrhoea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Headache, muscular pain because you unconsciously tense up. Stiff neck or lower back pain without being able to relate it to having done anything in particular.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 You feel depressed and gloomy, possibly even dejected, as though nothing has a point.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Crying fits or anger that makes people around you wonder what\u2019s the matter with you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 You become forgetful and don\u2019t remember to do things, miss meetings or dental or hair appointments.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 You have difficulty staying focused on what you\u2019re doing, your mind wanders, and it becomes more difficult for you to get things done.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Your brain fixates on one thing. You could call it tunnel vision or that you\u2019re suddenly blinkered. You only see what is directly in front of you, which means that your ability to problem-solve is reduced.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Anxiety<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Several bodily reactions such as high blood pressure, increased pulse rate, or a weakened immune system, meaning that you are often ill and succumb to colds and viruses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We are never going to get away from a certain amount of stress. And we also need it to be able to perform to the best of our ability, to develop as people and to motivate us to carry out certain tasks. It\u2019s all about balance, a word that often comes up when looking at health and fitness, meaning a balance between activity and rest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tips:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n There\u2019s a saying that \u2018It\u2019s not about how you feel \u2013 it\u2019s how you cope with it\u2019, and there\u2019s a lot of truth in that. Our approach to what happens around us is what drives things, not the actual stresses themselves, and that is the point of increasing your knowledge about how thoughts affect feelings. Let me give you an example:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Scenario:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Your boss walks by you in the corridor, nods a greeting and does not stop and chat the way they normally do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1.<\/strong> You think \u2013 \u2018they\u2019re angry with me\u2019. 2.<\/strong> You think \u2013 \u2018they\u2019re really busy with end-of-year accounting at the moment\u2019. 3.<\/strong> You think \u2013 \u2018they\u2019re not in a good place \u2013 there\u2019s something wrong\u2019. Three ways of dealing with the same situation, with completely different consequences for your health. Going off and worrying about something for an entire day creates stress and anxiety, so be aware of how you allow your thoughts to get carried away in different directions, creating a problem for you, in most cases totally unnecessarily. Catastrophe is seldom as close as we think.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tips:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n In any event, I would say that the main culprit when it comes to stress is the inability to say NO \u2013 to take on too much and not see the difference between what constitutes your own self-worth and the person who always performs and achieves at work. We ARE NOT our achievements, and we are perfectly good enough even if we don\u2019t do everything at the same time, or have perfect homes, children and bodies. How many people are there who say to friends and acquaintances when they are asked how they are: \u2018Well, I\u2019m up to my eyes \u2013 haven\u2019t got a spare minute, actually. If only there were more hours in the day.\u2019 That is NOT a positive thing. I\u2019m delighted when my friends say that they had a lovely weekend without a single planned activity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019ve put together a list of my best \u2018take \u2013 control \u2013 of \u2013 stress\u2019 tips. Try to select a few and focus on them the following week:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Practical tips for taking control of your stress<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Make it a priority to sleep well, eat regularly and take physical exercise. That is key for getting into a good position to manage the challenges of everyday life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 A lot of hugs \u2013 close physical contact releases the body\u2019s \u2018peace and quiet hormones\u2019 that allow the body to wind down more easily.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Have a regular sex life \u2013 orgasms reduce tensions in the body and also help us to relax and let go of frustrations and feelings that are bottled up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Say NO. Practise saying that word every day in different contexts. The more often you say it, the easier it will get. Create what Bodil J\u00f6nsson coined as \u2018set-up time\u2019 in her book \u2018Tio tankar om tid\u2019 (which has been translated as \u2018Ten Thoughts About Time\u2019) that means you have the time to think, feel your feelings and reflect before you say yes out of habit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Stop making excuses! Just say YES or NO. You don\u2019t need to give your life history as to why you\u2019re saying NO to a task at work or a night out with friends.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Make lists of priorities where only the essential things are included. Lists are all well and good, but they can also easily become flight behaviour and produce stress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Practise NOT doing everything on the list \u2013 \u2018not doing\u2019 also deserves credit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Reward yourself in the form of rest, massage, a walk, reading a good book, listening to your favourite music for half an hour, etc. when you\u2019ve completed a task. Stop rewarding yourself with food, sweets and edible things. Give yourself kindness and loving care instead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Compare the demands you make on yourself with those you make on others. Find a balance between \u2018in and out\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Delegate more! You are not indispensable, and neither your home nor your job is going to go under because some of the things you usually do are done by someone else.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Practise taking risks. This means saying no or doing things you don\u2019t normally do so as to get an idea of \u2018what\u2019s the worst that can happen?\u2019, which nine times out of ten isn\u2019t half as bad as you fear. You\u2019re not going to get fired from your job if you prioritise an event at your children\u2019s school when you\u2019ve actually got a meeting with the management group. You\u2019re not going to faint and fall to the floor if you say yes to giving a lecture. Debunk the myths of all the catastrophe scenarios your imagination unleashes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Schedule time for fun. Yes, you heard right. Having time for fun things in your leisure time, seeing your friends and simply enjoying yourself are more important than you think. So, make sure they happen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Take care of your relationships. We need friends and family, and anyone on earth may get fed up with a person who never has any time and is always on the go and busy with something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Keep a stress diary where you write down how the day has been, what situations you notice stress you out, what produces bodily reactions, or thoughts that set you off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Dare to stay with your uncomfortable feelings. One form of inner exposure is to localise where in your body you feel those feelings, describe how they feel and become aware of how you feel in different situations. This is a good way of identifying the causes of frustration and anger, which may often be disguised disappointment or stress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Come to terms with things you feel bad about. You can\u2019t please everyone, and \u2013 above all \u2013 you need to take care of YOURSELF to have what it takes to be there for other people. Refuse to give in to people who play on your feelings and take advantage of you in different ways. Real friends will still be there even if you\u2019re not available to meet their needs 24\/7.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2705 Sign an anti-stress agreement with yourself, focusing on what makes YOU feel good. Make sure you do something from it AT LEAST once a day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Don\u2019t stress, do your best and forget the rest\u2019<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Stress is the same thing as anxiety or fear \u2013 it\u2019s a threat that signals fight or flight. Our survival system, built in from time immemorial, kicks in: a biological…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":14940,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"editor_notices":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[102],"tags":[133,107,113,108,109,110],"class_list":["post-14939","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-motivation","tag-balans","tag-energi","tag-vanor","tag-livsstil","tag-somn","tag-stress"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n
Consequence: You spend the entire day worrying about what it can be about, double-checking all your jobs to see that you haven\u2019t missed anything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Consequence: You let go of it completely and get on with your day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Consequence: You become concerned for the person in question and follow things up by asking how they<\/em> are feeling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n